After my criticism last night, Becca texted me this morning: "I appreciate that this is your perspective and respect your opinion. As I've been such a difficult and uncaring wife, I am glad for you that you can now start over and I hope you'll come to feel that you've been given a second chance at life."
I replied: "I can tell that you are hurting - not what I wish for you. My heart feels grief over this. I can also tell that after all these years you still don't get it. I have not sought a second chance at 'life', but to grow in love through all of the difficulties and differences, regardless of the pain or presence or lack of happiness, which is such an elusive emotion. I have an abiding hope that one day you will understand what I am rattling on about. Until then we will continue to gently disagree, but not because I am being condescending, unkind, or dismissive of your feelings. I cannot make you see what I have tried to point out for eighteen years. I have been bowed over like a wind blown sapling for these years, but I shall stand up straight from now on. Your brother and committed friend."
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